what can i do next ?

Monday, November 2, 2009 ; 2:01:00 PM♥

was it the right choice ?

HOLIDAYS ARE HERE !! :) then again , when the the holidays arent here , you wish for them to come .. but when they're here , you are really bored are wished they're not around .. all the goods and bads of holidays ... i want to spend more time with anna , huixin , mandy , eileen , cheryl , and phoebe .. but phoebe is in the US already .. im starting to miss ger already .. i bet half the hyperness would be gone during training or when the lame family is hanging out tgt .. i wiill be missing her alot .. i am already missing her .. :( but what to do ? she is already at US .. cant do anything lerh .. how lehs ? haha ..

i miss him too .. i cant do anything bout it too .. we're not tgt already .. i dont know if ehe still loves me .. but .. still , i still love him .. and i miss him .. im still hoping to get back with him .. i dont even know if its possible .. we're gone because of his parents and teachers and his study pressure .. i dont know if its possible for a get-back .. i hope there is .. many people are telling me to get over him get on with life .. but for now , i just cant .. because i cant .. even telling anna there wasnt really much of a difference after i broke up with him is a lie .. i cry to bed everynight .. for the fact that i cant do anything further than that .. it may be better for him .. but not for me .. i dont want him to know that im sad and not happy over it .. he wants me to be happy .. but i just cant .. he was my greatest possesion in life and i have to give it up .. for his sake .. though im willing to give it up for his happiness , his better well-off life without me .. i cant bear to .. but i still did .. unwillingly .. i really hope that i can get back with him .. though i said i didnt want to be in the same class as him next year , it was all a lie ..

but .. anna just keep saying that jingting likes me and that its obvious .. i just cant help but not believe it .. someone tell me the right facts whether jingting likes me anot .. im really getting really frustrated .. some says yes and some says no .. i dont know which one to believe too .. and i just cant help not caring .. because he is one of the greatest enemy in my life ..
and all he does is just irritating me .